Joshua Pursley

Only a naked and winged infant baby god named Cupid armed with infinite desire arrows could understand true Valentine’s Day love.

Yolo, unless you insert additional coins in order to continue.

The first hurdle to overcome in becoming a track and field star is the most important.

According to popular nautical law, loose lips sink ships and tight lips float boats.

Fleece vests are great for when only my chest is cold, but nothing beats a pair of detached, wool sleeves when only my arms are chilly.

Can I enjoy “Spy Kids 3-D: Game Over” in 2-D, or must I see “Spy Kids 2: The Island of Lost Dreams” in 2-D, first? Note: I do not own 3-D glasses at this time.

You know, Johannes totally wrote the book on the Gutenberg Printing Press.

I stop possible flu attacks at the source. By elbowing everyone in the face during winter months.

So Santa can come down chimneys to deliver Christmas gaiety and fun, but when I try the same thing I get a face full of jolly pepper spray?

When Hollywood finally decides to reboot Santa Claus’s costume to be more aerodynamic, form fitting, and gritty, I’ll think about watching.